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Day #01

Where are you now?

Watch the video or scroll down if you prefer to read what today’s exercise is about. Also, REMEMBER to download the PDF 

CLICK HERE to download the Day #01 PDF

We all are expected to live up to certain expectations. That starts at a really young age.

We’re toddlers if not younger when parents start teaching us how we are expected to behave. Very quickly we learn what the right way is and what the wrong way of doing things is.

And it’s not just parents who put expectations upon us. All family members do this (as we do it to them too) – everyone from siblings, grandparents, aunts and uncles.

That’s just the start.

Then we go to school and we are presented with a whole new set of expectations. This time it’s teachers and classmates.

I’m sure you get the drift. All through life we are taught to live up to people’s expectations and rewarded for it. It is only on rare occasions that we get asked what expectations we have for ourselves.

Is it therefore any wonder that so many of us have no real idea what it is that we expect for ourselves?

Before we will figure that out, let’s first identify the most important expectations you’ve been taught to live up to.

CLICK HERE to download the Day #01 PDF

 

Day #02

What are my roles?

Watch the video or scroll down if you prefer to read what today’s exercise is about. Also, REMEMBER to download the PDF 

CLICK HERE to download the Day #02 PDF

Many of the things we do and behaviours we display are linked to roles we have (or think we have) in life.

We are husband, wife, daughter, son, parent, sibling, friends, co-worker, caretaker, umpire, peacekeeper, employee, class clown, etc.

Some of these roles and corresponding behaviours are so deeply ingrained in us; we don’t even notice them anymore. We certainly don’t question whether or not we should continue playing certain roles.

Playing a certain role, having a certain role is not necessarily good or bad. Right or wrong. It does however make sense to examine our roles every now and again. Only then can we consciously decide whether or not we want to continue fulfilling them.

CLICK HERE to download the Day #02 PDF

Day #03

What Are My Values, part 1: Who Are My Role Models?

Watch the video or scroll down if you prefer to read what today’s exercise is about. Also, REMEMBER to download the PDF 

CLICK HERE to download the Day #03 PDF

On day one I talked about values and why it’s not hard to see why they are the foundation beneath expectations.

Values are important and lasting beliefs or ideals about what is good or bad and desirable or undesirable. They have a major influence on a person’s behaviour and attitude and serve as broad guidelines in all situations.

Taking this definition of values it is not hard to see why – when people are not living in alignment with their values – people at some point start questioning the way they are living their lives.

Very often it’s only then that they start exploring how they want to live their lives. And when they are truly invested in finding the answer there always comes a point where the question ‘What are my core values and how do I live up to them?’ needs to be answered.

Finding the answer to the first part of this question is what we start doing today.

One of the things you can do to reconnect with your own values and expectations is look at the people you really admire.

It doesn’t matter whether they are alive or dead, real or fictional, famous or completely unknown. They can be your mum, your granddad, a famous actor, a politician, a neighbour, a teacher, a novelist or even a character from a movie or book. Anyone really!

What matters is that you really admire them for who they are, what they do, how they move through life …

Now look at the people you admire and take a minute to think about what it actually is you admire about them.

The things we admire in our role models are things, values we recognise or we aspire to embody in ourselves.

CLICK HERE to download the Day #03 PDF

Day #04

What Are My Values, Part 2: 20 Dream Jobs!

Watch the video or scroll down if you prefer to read what today’s exercise is about. Also, REMEMBER to download the PDF 

CLICK HERE to download the Day #04 PDF

It can be a challenge to figure out what you truly value in life; to give a name to the guiding principles or beliefs are that are of critical importance to you. One of the exercises that I know of that really help and is fun to do is this one.

First, I want you to create a list of 20 jobs (or roles) you would consider dream jobs. It is unimportant whether or not it is realistic to think you would ever have such a job. All that matters is that you would L-O-V-E to do these jobs.

If you’re thinking you’ll never get to a list of 20, just start your list with the jobs you dreamed of as a little kid and work your way to twenty from there. Any and all jobs can be on your list. Real and imagined. From politician to hospice worker. From fairy godmother to evil magician.

When you’re done with your list of 20, I want you to move on to the second part of the exercise: list three things you really like about each of those jobs or roles. 3 Things that characterise what makes that job or role appealing to you.

CLICK HERE to download the Day #04 PDF

If you’re having trouble finding the right words to describe what it is that you like, that appeals you in a particular job or role, the list of values I’ve compiled may help you.

CLICK HERE to download a List of Values

Day #05

What Are My Values, Part 3: Tying It All Together

If all went well you’ve looked at things that are important to you by looking at what you admire about your role models as well as by making a list of 20 dream jobs or roles and what it is that you find attractive about those.

When you’ve done both exercises you should now have quite a list of values.

Today is about organising that list into your set of core values.

Watch the video or scroll down if you prefer to read what today’s exercise is about. Also, REMEMBER to download the PDF 

CLICK HERE to download the Day #05 PDF

So look at the list of jobs and the things you really like about them, as well as the things you admire about your role models and see if you can find a common thread.

Take each of the things you value about those jobs. Perhaps you can group some of them together under one banner.

See if you can find three to five things, (banner) values that keep coming up for you.

Those will be the things that are truly important to you. They are your core values.

They are the values to keep in the forefront of your mind whenever you have to make a decision. Especially potentially life changing decisions.

Holding any decision up against your core values is kind of like using your values as a ‘measuring stick’.

Ask yourself: If I do this thing, am I being true to what is truly important to me? If the answer is ‘yes’ that may be a good reason for you to go ahead, while if it is not you may decide not to.

Of course, there can be other things to  consider too (like how others might be affected by your decision), but I’ve found my core values to be a really good place to start.

CLICK HERE to download the Day #05 PDF